Saturday, June 21, 2014

Parenting philosophy

Someone asked me once what my parenting philosophy is.
"What the fuck is a parenting philosophy?" was my response.
I guess it's answers to all these questions that you agree upon with your spouse before your child is even born.

ie: Will we spank him? Will we let him cry or run to him? Will he sleep in our bed or in his crib? 
Blah, blah, blah.

Yeah, Steve and I didn't do that.

I guess my parenting philosophy is to do what I feel is best for my child. And it is constantly evolving along with my child. So maybe I'm not the most prepared person by not having a parenting philosophy. I'm more of a figure-it-out-as-it-happens kind of person.

My parenting philosophy is to be an active mom. And not just in the sense that I work out and keep my body moving (although that too). I mean when I'm with my child, I am also present. I found the first few weeks I was looking for distractions whether it was the TV or checking the internet on my phone. And I hated myself for it. So I deleted those apps off my phone and stopped watching TV during the day unless they're asleep and I'm working out.

I will be present in the moment with my children when they want me to be. I will play playdoh with Brandon and push trains around on his train table and hold him tight when the stampede scene comes on during The Lion King. I will dangle toys over Holden and sing silly songs to him and cuddle him and smooch him. And when they want to be alone, I will let them. Brandon can play quietly in his room or his crib or go to his grandma's house to play sometimes. We all need isolation sometimes.

My boys and I are figuring it out together. My "philosophy" with working out has been "do better than yesterday." I guess that is my philosophy in parenting, too. Learn from my mistakes. Make them learn from theirs. Make more mistakes. Learn from those ones, too. Repeat.

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