I am so thankful for all of you who have helped me with these two kids. Whether it's watching one of them or buying us dinner or giving us baby and toddler stuff or visiting in the hospital; our friends and family have been really great.
Before, when people offered to help me, I brushed it off as a social nicety that people said but didn't really mean so I never took them up on it. But now - geez, with two kids and a broken abdomen, I can use all the help I can get. Fair warning: don't offer to help me - I will take you up on it. Perhaps immediately.
Yesterday was beautiful and Brandon was dying to go outside. I went out there for a few minutes with him, but Holden didn't like the breeze and it was too bright for his little eyes, so after 10 minutes, I told Brandon we were going inside. Brandon ran after me and tripped in a small hole left from when we had a tree removed. When he tried to get up, he immediately collapsed back to the ground.
I was afraid he had sprained his ankle. Four hours later, when he still wasn't walking or bearing weight on his foot, I called the doctor. They could get him in immediately. So I was all set to load the two kids into the car and drive to the doctor's office, until I stopped for a second and tried to picture hauling an infant and a two-year-old in simultaneously. My mind couldn't fathom saddlebagging the two of them with my broken abdomen, so I dialed up my friend Melinda who lives only a mile away. I could drop off Holden at their house on my way to the doctor.
Brandon's sprain is very minor and he doesn't need a cast and is already walking around with just a slight limp. But damn, yesterday was tough. It gets easier. My friend who has three boys and is pregnant with her forth child texted me, "I remember going from 1 to 2 and it's not easy but just remember every day is one day closer to what will be 'easy'!!" I remind myself of that every day. One day at a time. Fuck, I need a long nap and two bottles of wine just from these last three days on my own. But three of the hard days are down, many easier days are yet to come.
Thanks to all of you who are helping make the hard days a little easier on me. I am truly grateful.