Sunday, October 28, 2012

baby pictures

One of the benefits of working with a bunch of smart IT people is that they're rubbing off on me. After all this time, I've finally learned how to correctly use a scanner. Which means I am finally able to post a blog that I've wanted to for months now:
Here is a picture of me and of Steve as a baby. Who does Brandon look like? People are always asking me and I honestly have no idea.

Saturday, October 20, 2012

dinner time

Brandon eats baby food once a day now. And he takes control.
 He grabs the spoon, eats his bib.
 And gets just as messy as humanly possible. Probaby so he can get a bath afterwards. 

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Red October

In our front yard, we have these bushes:
They have thorns and always prick me while I'm weeding. They grow like crazy and require a lot of trimming. I've already pulled two of them out; one day, the rest.
But for about two weeks every fall, they turn bright red and begin to shed their tiny leaves all over our sidewalk. I love pulling into our driveway in the fall and seeing the bushes in their vibrant new color.
Soon all of the leaves will be gone, and the bushes will just look like a bundle of sticks and thorns in the winter snow. And then spring will come and the leaves will grow back and change into their burgundy hue. And then, next October, I will love the bushes for those two weeks when they are vibrant again.

Sunday, October 14, 2012

a new season

Week one of my new job completed. I am healthier and happier already. I come home at lunch and make myself something hot to eat on the chilly fall days. I have started a book and a puzzle again. I am not completely stressed out and frustrated. I get to sleep in later and spend an extra hour a day with my baby. Life is good. Life is what it could have been before. Sometimes I kick myself for spending two and a half years at a company that I couldn't grow within and made me crazy. Two and a half years that I didn't spend at a company I did love and could grow within. But it's over now and things are looking up.
 Fall is here and I love fall weather. Now if only  my coats fit! Brandon and I are going shopping today for coats and boots - two of my favorite things. Steve tells me I'm looking thinner already on this thyroid medication. It might not be true, but I'll believe it. I am going to clean this house today. Nothing is better than a perfectly cleaned house. My pessimism is already turning to optimism! I hardly know myself anymore. It's time reclaim my old self.

Sunday, October 7, 2012

out with the old

I'm starting a new job tomorrow. And Brandon is starting at a new daycare. We weren't thrilled with the old daycare. His room was in the basement so each morning I'd have to teeter down the stairs in my four-inch high heels holding Brandon in his infant carrier which weighs about fifty pounds. Every night during pickup they would mop the stairs. It took sometimes ten minutes to exit their parking lot back onto the main street.

The girl in the morning was great and Brandon loved her. But she only worked in the mornings a few days a week. The afternoon girls were lazy and would just talk to each other while the kids cried in their cribs or drooled all over themselves. Brandon always had a full diaper when we picked him up. He was often wearing someone else's clothes. He once had someone else's pacifier in his mouth. He wouldn't eat very much at daycare. Steve and I hated that place.

There is a daycare right across the parking lot from my new job. I went and checked it out. There were much fewer children - not a baby mill like our current place. The convenience of being able to walk over and see him at lunch every day really appealed to me. So we booked his spot at the new daycare. I was planning to march right up to the desk at my old daycare and tell them exactly why I was withdrawing Brandon from their facility. But I couldn't do it.

I had Steve call. He couldn't do it either. He couldn't tell them how much they sucked or how lazy their employees were. He couldn't even say, "she got a new job and there is another daycare closer to it." So he told them we're pulling Brandon out because I am going to be a stay-at-home mom. All last week, every single daycare worker has talked to me about how good it will be for me to be able to stay at home with him, how they did when their children were young, how they grow up so fast and I should cherish these moments with him.

All week I pretended to these people that I'm going to be a stay-at-home mom. But tomorrow I will be a working mom all over again. Maybe one day I'll be a stay-at-home mom. But until then, I just act like I am to relative strangers.

Thursday, October 4, 2012

fatty with no energy

There is a book and a movie called "Thinner" by Stephen King. In it, an obese man is cursed by a gypsy and loses three pounds a day, regardless of what he eats. At first, he thinks it's great, until he begins to waste away. I have the opposite problem - I gain three pounds a day. Seriously - it's bad. I don't have any clothes that fit and I am about three days away from pulling out the maternity clothes again. At first, we thought maybe my birth control had failed me and I was pregnant again.

But then the headaches came on - a headache behind my right eye right underneath my brow. The headache lasts all day but progressively gets worse. By 8pm, I'm in bed because I can't do anything else. So last week, I went to the doctor. I never go to the doctor. But something is obviously wrong. They ran some blood tests and discovered my thyroid levels were low. They recommended I see an endocrinologist.

This morning, I went to see her.  I have hypothyroidism. Apparently it's pretty common postpartum. I weigh as much now as I did when I was nine months pregnant. But now I have an excuse. I was falling asleep at 8 o'clock for a reason. I was prescribed a pill to regulate my thyroid levels and hopefully in a couple of months I'll be completely back to normal. "Just don't get pregnant before then," she warned me. "Don't worry," I assured her, "I won't." My body still hasn't cleaned up after my last pregnancy. The last thing I need is to add to my body's problems. 

Wednesday, October 3, 2012


Is is pathetic to get a little sad about a kids' clothing store closing?
Because OshKosh is closing.
And I'm a little sad.

They have great clothes - non-babyish clothes for babies. They have sales and coupons you can use together to make you think you're getting a great deal when you're actually just paying normal prices for clothes. And they have the best return policy ever - you can return clothes for up to a YEAR after you bought them with or without a receipt.

I have been buying clothes there since before Brandon was even born. We have history together. After my baby shower, my sister and I went there to buy more stuff. It's my store. But over lunch today, they told me October 13th is their last day open. The mall is closing and reopening in a year, bigger and better. A year without OshKosh. And just when my year was looking up! All good things must end someday. At least it's still the Year of Holly in my fantasy football league.